This week’s blog is a little different! I shuffled the deck, selected six cards to let my tarot deck tell a story………….
Don’t hide your magic. It’s easy for them to say. The glamourous witchy YouTubers who have fifty thousand followers…….they can be exactly who they want to be because they are now paid to do it! They get to live, eat and breath their authenticity……not all of us can do that.
I work in a heavily masculine dominate environment. A corporate concrete box of pale, male and stale traders who are constantly bashing their egos together. I feel out of place….all the time. I cannot wait to escape, to get home and just be me. To look at my tiny glass jars filled with speckled white snowflake obsidian and lavender clippings. Or my book of shadows. To shuffle my tarot cards and ask what my future holds……
My heart feels confused. I want to be myself, but I don’t know how. I’ve decided to set an intention tonight on this waxing full moon…..to dream in a change, to help clear the fogginess of my heart.
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Today Clive called me into the office. Clive is an expert in his field. There isn’t anything he doesn’t know about the insurance industry. Unfortunately, we have never connected on a personal level. He isn’t really in touch with his emotional intelligent side. Sometimes I feel like I irritate his soul. It is as if I can see past his shell and on some level, he knows it.
As Clive sat in his huge office chair, back straight and focus sharp he peered into my eyes and came right out with it. My job is redundant……cut backs and budget reforms……all these words. I didn’t hear much, because my heart was singing so loudly.
I packed up my desk box with my aloe vera plant and rose quartz wand without even looking back at my now ex-colleagues. This is the new start that I have been waiting for, finally the Universe has stepped in to help push me along…….
My parents were shocked to hear my news. My dad really wanted me to progress in the insurance industry, it’s a job for life (apparently). But my mum knows I’m more creative and I’ve told her how restrictive it makes me feel at times, in fact, all of the time.
The conversation with my parents was the perfect time to tell them who I am, the real me. I am a Witch. I have a connection to the moon that can make me feel whole, or throw my emotions completely off balance. I can think of someone then see them the next day and I often feel like I know what others are thinking. I can see and feel spirit people. I love using tarot cards and get a buzz in my hand when I hold a crystal for a little while. I have dreams that turn into reality a few weeks later. I can feel other people’s tears, joy and anxiety…….I like to make intention jars, and sometimes the wishes I put into those jars comes true……..I want to help others in a way that I cannot put into words. I want to live my purpose.
My mum listened intently and smiled so warmly at my words that it made me want to cry. She put her hands on both my shoulders and said “be you, step into the world, be authentically you, grow and show your magic…..”
So that’s what I did. I put my heart on my sleeve, I stepped into my feelings instead of running away from them. I understood that some people wouldn’t get me, and that’s ok. Because the upside of that is that so many will get me………..they will catch my drift…..I will vibrate so high that my tribe will have no choice but to come running in my direction.
I don’t know what the future holds but I know that it’s going to be an exciting one. I’m going to let my creativity flow, allow my magic to shine and become the inner witch I was always meant to be.
Until next time
Tanya
