Walking From Our Shadows

It is two days after Christmas, and I have just had one of my strongest out of body experiences to date.  As soon as I awoke, I sat right down at my laptop to record it, so I do not forget a thing.

It’s important for me to point out that this wasn’t just a lucid dream, this is an experience where I left my body entirely and entered another reality that lightly presses against our own.  Because I believe there are many of these realities, in fact, too many for any human mind to fathom.

This all happened during an afternoon nap, well a mid-day nap because I haven’t been feeling too well today.  For some reason, out of body experiences tend to happen when I either go back to sleep in the morning or when I shouldn’t really be asleep at all.

I must have only been sleeping for half an hour or so when I recognised that feeling of viewing my bedroom through my spirit eyes.  I can flair my arms around me and they cut through the air like I’m swimming in the lightest ocean, as there is no atmosphere here.  I can sort of “see” my body, it is made up of the finest, lightest particles so that they almost twinkle and shimmer as my arm moves and I can see right through my limbs.  

I know I can float if I want too but my intention is to sit up and look around, as if I was still in a physical body.  So that is what I do.  I also know that in this place I can get to wherever I want to go quickly, it is only a thought away, it is made up of my mental world, physical things appear to be a by-product if that makes sense.

The first thing I decide to do is lightly float next door into my neighbour’s bedroom.  

The feeling of moving through walls in an astral body is the same every single time I do it.  You can feel the “matter” as you move through the cement, it is like a sticky slow vibration that has a cooler temperature and only lasts a few seconds as walls are surprisingly thin and once you are out on the other side the vibration sort of pings again and there you are in the other room.

Whilst all this is happening, I am trying my hardest to not only navigate my new body, but also trying not to go back to my physical body in the other reality that is “sort of” next door.  

I can “hear” with my human ears and know my daughter is playing in her bedroom next to me and I’m complexly conscious to the fact that the state I am to keep myself in to be able to stay within this reality is a fine balance between being lightly asleep and awake.  Which means, any outside noise that is loud enough will startle me and pull me straight back into my physical body like a giant magnet.

So, bearing this in mind, I concentrate hard in this new reality and I realise that I can hear the faint sound of music coming from downstairs in my neighbour’s house.  I am trying to move around the room and focus on the wallpaper in their bedroom.  I must point something out here – I am not in their Earth bedroom.  I am in their room that exists within this reality.  So, I will describe their wallpaper, but it will more than likely not be the wallpaper they have up now.  Or it might be, I guess I will never know because it’s highly unlikely I will be in their bedroom any time soon……anyway, I digress….

The wallpaper is uniformed with like a pink tear drop pattern, with a darker outline and the surface feels bumpy, like that wallpaper from the 1980s with the bubbles that I really wanted to pick off….

Dragging my astral finger along the bumps on their wall as a I study the pattern in its intricate detail, a noise came from my Earth house, and I was pulled so fast back into my human body that when I woke fully up the room was spinning, and it took me a minute to settle my head back into my own reality. 

I was awake, but not for long, I decided to go straight back to sleep and try to go back where I had just come from.  

Luckily, it worked.  Within minutes, I had fallen back into the deep meditative state that allows you to penetrate the reality.  I had to start all over again by peeling myself out of my physical, but this time it was rather easy.  I decided to not go next door but go out the wall on the other side of my house instead.

Pushing myself through my upstairs external wall I braced myself to fall like a stone on the other side and sighed relief as I glided down toward the side alley in bright sunshine.  The first thing I noticed as I landed was the huge stack of bricks that were balancing up right as high as the roof, someone clearly has a DIY project on.  Then I realised that this was no longer my house on Earth, but my parents.   Well, that’s my dad, I thought, who loves DIY and loves grabbing bricks when he can.  

I floated along the alley way to the front of the house.   Yes, it was certainly my parent’s house but with my bay window from my current Earth home?  Weird, this is a hybrid of the two Earth homes I have ever lived in.  I approached the small gate to let me out on to the street and noted a knocker with a loins head on the side, with this knowing that a lion is symbolic and important to me (I’m still trying to figure out that part but to me, a loin has always signified strength of character).

Out on the street, I decided that flying is quicker than walking so I float gracefully into the atmosphere knowing that I will not go too high if I don’t want to.  As I slowly spin up there, I look down and see a brown-haired woman in her late 30s rushing in my direction.  She has a short fringe and a beige coat on (wrong clothes for the weather, I noted).

“Are we dead?  Are you dead?  Is this where we go when we die?” is my flustered question, which appears to be the same script every time I have an out of body experience and meet another person on my travels.  

“No, we are not dead.  But we cannot run from our shadows here” she said eerily as she turned her head to look behind her and rushed hurriedly on, like someone was following her.

What a poignant line “we cannot run from our shadows here” I thought as I floated down my parents’ street.  I thought about what she said and what it means.  To me, it means that all your good parts and bad parts are laid bare for all to see, so that you have no choice but to work on them……

I decided to travel on.  Down the road, I noted that the streets are pretty much empty of cars, it’s very quiet. Two ladies were outside a house and having a natter.  They both look past me but can see me and say, “better be quick, they are coming soon”.  I instantly know they are referring to the fact that this is the place where shadows cannot be made therefore secrets cannot be created and I felt afraid.  Basically, everything I ever wanted to keep to myself is about to be laid out bare for all to see……

As I floated on toward the park to my left, the park that I played in on Earth as a child, I felt myself getting drawn inward toward the tops of the trees.  I felt out of control and noted that the sky began to darken and through the trees I saw a loan man in the park and he was not a nice man, I sensed utter fear and danger and noted that he had a magnetic effect.  One thing is for certain, in this place you don’t have to be an empath to pick up on vibes, they come to you instantly.  

Like drugs, nicotine, alcohol, or any Earthly material substance (or act) that lowers your vibration, it was almost magnetic in its nature and wanted to suck me in like a black hole.  I knew that the only way back from that was to “wake up” into my physical and just like Dorothy wanting to get back home, all I had to do was ask and my eyes opened back in bed.

 As I lay there, processing it all, I knew where I had just been was another layer of existence that some of us may find ourselves in when we leave this Earthly realm.  I say, some, not all.  

I believe this is the place some may find themselves when they really need to work on some hard lessons that they didn’t quite break through on Earth.  The lure to pull me in to the dark park with that man was strong and I had to use my full intention to not go there.  The same principal of when we need to use our force of will to stay strong on this side to not undo good behaviour that we know is helping us on our journey.  That we know is raising our vibration.

I don’t want this blog post to freak anyone out thinking that this is the place we go to when we die, because I do not believe it is.  As I mentioned on opening the blog, I strongly believe there are vast amounts of these layers of realities that mirror our own exitance and because we enter a mental reality (as opposed to a physical) then how we are feeling at that time reflects the place we end up in.  

One thing that is always a certainty to me is that a) the places we find ourselves are only temporary and b) there is always a loving person next to us that can help us whenever things get too strange, scary or tough.  All we have to do is ask for help.

After this experience, I decided to ask my tarot some questions about the place, to see if I was right with how I feel about it.  The answers to my questions were very insightful!

Question one; What was this reality? 

Answer; Five of Pentacles; the place people go when they are feeling very low, downcast and like they are outsiders who cannot move within happier circles.  (The picture on this card is literally two people walking within the shadows).

Question Two; What is the point of this reality? 

Answer; The Star; To heal.  Like everything, this pain is only temporary.

Question Three; How does it help you heal? 

Answer; The two of Pentacles; it allows you to weigh up things, to try and seek balance, to keep working on and checking in on yourself so you are not over doing things – its learning the art of patience and temperance in all things.

Question Four; Can we leave if we want too?

Answer; The Lovers; everything is always a choice.  But choices are harder after we have made an initial investment, we may think we have more to lose.  If we walk away from the material things that hold us down, what do we have left?  We must rely on our sense of spirit, is that enough?  Therefore, some choose to stay attached to their material obsessions as it brings them more comfort than exposing their true selves to work on and improve on.

Until next time,


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