Not many people understand how much a medium must study and develop to become better at their practice. There are a lot more mechanics to mediumship than people realise, it is a lot more than simply sitting to receive information from loved ones in spirit.
As a psychic medium, I have different teachers to fulfil all my developmental needs. I have a professional tarot and business mentor and I also have an online learning group with a UK medium which I have recently joined. This group is purely for developing my own mediumship skills.
One thing to note is that this learning group is purely via Zoom, it is mostly people from the UK but there is also a lady from the USA that gets up mega early to attend and a lady from Scotland.
Another common misconception is that a mediumship reading will not be as good if it is performed via Zoom. Try as I might to explain to people that energy can be at any place at any time and it doesn’t matter where you are in the world to receive an energy link, some people still can’t seem to wrap their mind around it.
My following example of what happened on Saturday is a great one to prove that it doesn’t matter if a reading is done online, it can still be incredible.
I read for two people on the morning. The first one wasn’t great. The man in spirit was a difficult person to talk to, his personality has not changed (our personality does not alter after death) so it was like pulling teeth to converse with him. The evidence was not coming thick and fast as I had hoped.
So, just before my second session, I put the intent out there to connect with a much easier spirit!
In the few seconds that I said hello to the lovely Scottish lady who would be my sitter, I became aware of her friend, a colleague, around her energy in the spirit world. This lady was what I would describe as larger than life. She was quite a curvaceous shape and she owned it with confidence! Because she was so vivacious, she made this reading so much easier and pleasurable for me! Here is what she showed me (key points), and my sitters feedback;
She died young (before 50) of cancer and needed some form of crutch to walk toward the end of her life
She did die of cancer and needed a stick to walk toward the end
She was a larger lady and owned it well, she was the life and soul of the party
Yes, she was a bigger lady who wore miniskirts and had so much confidence, everyone loved her!
She sat in a different department to my sitter, my sitter would need to walk outside her office and along the corridor to go and talk to the lady who is now is spirit.
This is correct
My sitter and this lady were friends but not close, however my sitter generally misses her energy, as does everyone. She had a huge turnout for her funeral.
Exactly right
The lady in spirit was drawing my attention to a son. Then she told me that not everyone could attend her funeral, and some had to watch via Zoom.
All correct, the lady’s son was in New Zealand so could not attend, he had to watch on video link.
There is one lady in the department who the lady in spirit was particular good friends with and can my sitter pass on a message of good wishes and love from the lady in spirit?
Yes, this lady is called Mary and she will certainly pass on her love
Throughout the reading, the lady kept saying “a name beginning with S” and then said “Susan”.
The lady in spirit was called Sue
I won’t lie, I was buzzing after this reading. I call these readings one in ten, because they don’t come around that often (currently). My other mediumship readings are great but this one was in my eyes perfect, because lovley Sue allowed me to link directly with her gorgeous positive energy and let her friend know that she is absolutely still around and absolutely ok.
So here is the rub, if you are the sort of person that loves to chat, uplift and have a giggle in this life, you won’t be changing any time soon in the afterlife and the good news is that you will be able to give your human family a pretty good chance of connecting with you!
Until next time,
Tanya
Thank you for reading my blog………if you are interested in a private tarot reading or if you would love to learn tarot, do drop me an email! I am a professional psychic medium, specialising in tarot reading.
It is two days after Christmas, and I have just had one of my strongest out of body experiences to date. As soon as I awoke, I sat right down at my laptop to record it, so I do not forget a thing.
It’s important for me to point out that this wasn’t just a lucid dream, this is an experience where I left my body entirely and entered another reality that lightly presses against our own. Because I believe there are many of these realities, in fact, too many for any human mind to fathom.
This all happened during an afternoon nap, well a mid-day nap because I haven’t been feeling too well today. For some reason, out of body experiences tend to happen when I either go back to sleep in the morning or when I shouldn’t really be asleep at all.
I must have only been sleeping for half an hour or so when I recognised that feeling of viewing my bedroom through my spirit eyes. I can flair my arms around me and they cut through the air like I’m swimming in the lightest ocean, as there is no atmosphere here. I can sort of “see” my body, it is made up of the finest, lightest particles so that they almost twinkle and shimmer as my arm moves and I can see right through my limbs.
I know I can float if I want too but my intention is to sit up and look around, as if I was still in a physical body. So that is what I do. I also know that in this place I can get to wherever I want to go quickly, it is only a thought away, it is made up of my mental world, physical things appear to be a by-product if that makes sense.
The first thing I decide to do is lightly float next door into my neighbour’s bedroom.
The feeling of moving through walls in an astral body is the same every single time I do it. You can feel the “matter” as you move through the cement, it is like a sticky slow vibration that has a cooler temperature and only lasts a few seconds as walls are surprisingly thin and once you are out on the other side the vibration sort of pings again and there you are in the other room.
Whilst all this is happening, I am trying my hardest to not only navigate my new body, but also trying not to go back to my physical body in the other reality that is “sort of” next door.
I can “hear” with my human ears and know my daughter is playing in her bedroom next to me and I’m complexly conscious to the fact that the state I am to keep myself in to be able to stay within this reality is a fine balance between being lightly asleep and awake. Which means, any outside noise that is loud enough will startle me and pull me straight back into my physical body like a giant magnet.
So, bearing this in mind, I concentrate hard in this new reality and I realise that I can hear the faint sound of music coming from downstairs in my neighbour’s house. I am trying to move around the room and focus on the wallpaper in their bedroom. I must point something out here – I am not in their Earth bedroom. I am in their room that exists within this reality. So, I will describe their wallpaper, but it will more than likely not be the wallpaper they have up now. Or it might be, I guess I will never know because it’s highly unlikely I will be in their bedroom any time soon……anyway, I digress….
The wallpaper is uniformed with like a pink tear drop pattern, with a darker outline and the surface feels bumpy, like that wallpaper from the 1980s with the bubbles that I really wanted to pick off….
Dragging my astral finger along the bumps on their wall as a I study the pattern in its intricate detail, a noise came from my Earth house, and I was pulled so fast back into my human body that when I woke fully up the room was spinning, and it took me a minute to settle my head back into my own reality.
I was awake, but not for long, I decided to go straight back to sleep and try to go back where I had just come from.
Luckily, it worked. Within minutes, I had fallen back into the deep meditative state that allows you to penetrate the reality. I had to start all over again by peeling myself out of my physical, but this time it was rather easy. I decided to not go next door but go out the wall on the other side of my house instead.
Pushing myself through my upstairs external wall I braced myself to fall like a stone on the other side and sighed relief as I glided down toward the side alley in bright sunshine. The first thing I noticed as I landed was the huge stack of bricks that were balancing up right as high as the roof, someone clearly has a DIY project on. Then I realised that this was no longer my house on Earth, but my parents. Well, that’s my dad, I thought, who loves DIY and loves grabbing bricks when he can.
I floated along the alley way to the front of the house. Yes, it was certainly my parent’s house but with my bay window from my current Earth home? Weird, this is a hybrid of the two Earth homes I have ever lived in. I approached the small gate to let me out on to the street and noted a knocker with a loins head on the side, with this knowing that a lion is symbolic and important to me (I’m still trying to figure out that part but to me, a loin has always signified strength of character).
Out on the street, I decided that flying is quicker than walking so I float gracefully into the atmosphere knowing that I will not go too high if I don’t want to. As I slowly spin up there, I look down and see a brown-haired woman in her late 30s rushing in my direction. She has a short fringe and a beige coat on (wrong clothes for the weather, I noted).
“Are we dead? Are you dead? Is this where we go when we die?” is my flustered question, which appears to be the same script every time I have an out of body experience and meet another person on my travels.
“No, we are not dead. But we cannot run from our shadows here” she said eerily as she turned her head to look behind her and rushed hurriedly on, like someone was following her.
What a poignant line “we cannot run from our shadows here” I thought as I floated down my parents’ street. I thought about what she said and what it means. To me, it means that all your good parts and bad parts are laid bare for all to see, so that you have no choice but to work on them……
I decided to travel on. Down the road, I noted that the streets are pretty much empty of cars, it’s very quiet. Two ladies were outside a house and having a natter. They both look past me but can see me and say, “better be quick, they are coming soon”. I instantly know they are referring to the fact that this is the place where shadows cannot be made therefore secrets cannot be created and I felt afraid. Basically, everything I ever wanted to keep to myself is about to be laid out bare for all to see……
As I floated on toward the park to my left, the park that I played in on Earth as a child, I felt myself getting drawn inward toward the tops of the trees. I felt out of control and noted that the sky began to darken and through the trees I saw a loan man in the park and he was not a nice man, I sensed utter fear and danger and noted that he had a magnetic effect. One thing is for certain, in this place you don’t have to be an empath to pick up on vibes, they come to you instantly.
Like drugs, nicotine, alcohol, or any Earthly material substance (or act) that lowers your vibration, it was almost magnetic in its nature and wanted to suck me in like a black hole. I knew that the only way back from that was to “wake up” into my physical and just like Dorothy wanting to get back home, all I had to do was ask and my eyes opened back in bed.
As I lay there, processing it all, I knew where I had just been was another layer of existence that some of us may find ourselves in when we leave this Earthly realm. I say, some, not all.
I believe this is the place some may find themselves when they really need to work on some hard lessons that they didn’t quite break through on Earth. The lure to pull me in to the dark park with that man was strong and I had to use my full intention to not go there. The same principal of when we need to use our force of will to stay strong on this side to not undo good behaviour that we know is helping us on our journey. That we know is raising our vibration.
I don’t want this blog post to freak anyone out thinking that this is the place we go to when we die, because I do not believe it is. As I mentioned on opening the blog, I strongly believe there are vast amounts of these layers of realities that mirror our own exitance and because we enter a mental reality (as opposed to a physical) then how we are feeling at that time reflects the place we end up in.
One thing that is always a certainty to me is that a) the places we find ourselves are only temporary and b) there is always a loving person next to us that can help us whenever things get too strange, scary or tough. All we have to do is ask for help.
After this experience, I decided to ask my tarot some questions about the place, to see if I was right with how I feel about it. The answers to my questions were very insightful!
Question one; What was this reality?
Answer; Five of Pentacles; the place people go when they are feeling very low, downcast and like they are outsiders who cannot move within happier circles. (The picture on this card is literally two people walking within the shadows).
Question Two; What is the point of this reality?
Answer; The Star; To heal. Like everything, this pain is only temporary.
Question Three; How does it help you heal?
Answer; The two of Pentacles; it allows you to weigh up things, to try and seek balance, to keep working on and checking in on yourself so you are not over doing things – its learning the art of patience and temperance in all things.
Question Four; Can we leave if we want too?
Answer; The Lovers; everything is always a choice. But choices are harder after we have made an initial investment, we may think we have more to lose. If we walk away from the material things that hold us down, what do we have left? We must rely on our sense of spirit, is that enough? Therefore, some choose to stay attached to their material obsessions as it brings them more comfort than exposing their true selves to work on and improve on.
There is one thing having my very own profound spiritual experiences to write about, but when I get the chance to listen to other stories, well that really excites me. Because it validates and strengthens my resolve that there is more to this 3D reality than meets our eyes.
Recently, a lovely friend and member of my psychic circle shared the most fascinating of past encounters.
I want to put a caveat in here before I tell her story, in that the lady who told me this is one that I trust inexplicably. She is a gifted medium yet solidly has her feet on the ground, there isn’t anything airy fairy about her, she says it how it is, and she questions everything. I feel it’s important that I tell you that, because this next story is so unreal but equally fascinating!
The reason why she shared her story is because it was the end of our meditation class and she noted that she struggles with meditation and to truly switch off. We asked why and she said she believes it might be from a weird experience she had once at a trance mediumship event. Trance allows an experienced medium to enter a very deep state of meditation so that a spirit can literally “take over” the medium and channel information directly through them. Often, the medium may change their mannerisms, accent, even start to look different as the messages are conveyed. I will now paraphrase my friend’s story, just as she told us;
“So, there I was at this trance mediumship circle. I had never done trance before; this was a totally new experience for me. I sat with the others as the medium who would be going into trance sat in the centre of our circle and she had another medium sitting directly next to her, holding her hand. Apparently, this is to keep the trance medium grounded throughout the session as the energy used can be very draining and could be detrimental to her health.
Once she went into her trance, she began to talk, and she did sound different. I found this fascinating, until she announced that she was an alien from another Universe. I must admit, I was smiling inside and looked away. Now, I’m a Medium and obviously I believe in spirits and life after death…but ETs? I’m not so sure. So, whilst this is going on, inside I’m questioning everything.
Suddenly, the medium stopped talking then addressed the circle directly and said “There is someone in this circle who does not believe me”.
The hairs went up on the back of my neck, I felt a little self-conscious. I was showing no outward sign that I did not believe her, I was just sitting as was everyone else was in the circle.
The trance medium then proceeded to point her finger at each member of the group, saying, “not you, not you, not you” and as she came to me, stopped and stared me in the eye and said “it’s you, you do not believe”.
I must admit at this point I was horrified, plus felt a little flustered with all eyes on me. The medium sitting with her, asked me to stand up and approach them in the centre.
I willingly did what she asked, not sure what was about to happen.
The medium took my hand and told me to “Feel this”. I wasn’t sure what she meant until I felt what can only be described as a charge of electricity go up from the soles of my feet and travel so fast all the way up my body and out of the top of my head. I was astounded by this physical sensation and not only that, I saw a clear vision in my mind’s eye. As the medium gripped my hand, I watched aliens that live and walk amongst us here on Earth. It was abundantly clear to me at that point, we are not alone, there are Aliens amongst us, and we have absolutely no idea.
Once she let go of my hand, she asked me if I believe now? I nodded my head and walked back to my space in the circle. For the rest of the evening, I couldn’t wait to leave and process what had just happened.
As I travelled home, I played the whole thing repeatedly in my mind. It was utterly unreal, yet it happened to me.
That night in bed, I finally fell into a deep sleep. I was rudely awoken a few hours later, by a solid hand tugging on my right ankle which yanked me across the bed toward the end. In my horror, I gripped on to my duvet, looked up and right into the face of an alien. I know this part is hard to believe, but it happened! I screamed for my life which awoke my husband, seeing me half off the bed, asked me what the hell was going on.
I told him that something had grabbed me and was pulling me off the bed, to which he told me not to be silly and go back to sleep. I must have been dreaming, he protested. But I wasn’t. I saw an alien with my own eyes, and it physically pulled me along my bed.
The next morning, I was so traumatised by the whole thing, I went to church. I felt like I needed to cleanse myself. Thankfully, nothing ever happened like that again, but it was certainly one of the profoundest moments I have ever had. I think that is why I can’t meditate, do you?”
She asked the group, as we all burst into laughter. As she told her story, you could have heard a pin drop and after we had stopped laughing, we said, joking aside, that it was amazing and a validation that there is so much more that we haven’t even scratched the surface of yet.
So, you see, I had to share her story, it was too incredible not too! Aliens, who live, and walk amongst us……
How do you pull yourself back to being grounded, grateful and with a feeling of inner peace when all your mind wants to do is self-destruct and rip apart every layer of you?
Even the most “together” of people may shock you with the fact they are dealing with many internal conflicts, anxieties, and jumbles of feeling that they are not sure where to place.
Sometimes I feel the whole point of being a human being is to be programmed so that we are starkly aware of the negative side of “life” to give us the nudge to find the joy in as much as we can.
One thing is for sure. It is not easy being human.
Sometimes I must remind myself to get back to “me” by doing certain things that I know will help. I often find that I am looking for something that I know is missing but I have no idea what that thing is. Does that sound familiar to you?
The more I read tarot for people the more I understand that we are all looking for this thing. But how do we settle ourselves back to “us” when we are not even sure what we are looking for?
I know what works for me.
I must busy myself in a way that is not stressed or rushed, but productive and resourceful. To set goals, to stick to a plan, to focus.
It’s to smile and connect with people whenever I can, even when I do not feel like it. To remember that it is ok to say no.
I once read a book about a woman who pulled herself out of a cycle of poverty, disillusionment, and extreme toxic behaviour.
She got up every day with a plan. With a focus, a routine. She made herself busy, so that she made “energy” with the things and intentions that she focused on.
She spoke to literally everyone she met. The postman, the bank cashier, the teacher, the stranger in the street. She connected her energy with every human being that encountered her that day, even though she didn’t want to, she did. She was alone inside, so she made it a point to make these connections.
She did this every day and not only that, but she also wrote about her day. She journaled everything. Her thoughts and feelings, the why’s, why nots, questions, triggering thoughts and complex feelings. It all went down on paper before she fell asleep.
She soon found that by showing up to “do things”, to “connect” to “feel, express and create” shifted her energy in a way that almost moved the walls of her life around her to open out onto a vast landscape of new possibility.
By all these connections, by having a plan, by putting words on paper, she was manifesting, and her energy was changing.
She blogged about her life, her problems, her feelings. Someone of importance read her blogs and then they turned them into a story of her journey. She has sold millions of books….it changed her life overnight. But the work was done months and months leading up to the very moment that she sold her first book.
Instead of being in the mercy of her “life”, she decided to show up to it and move from passenger to driver. She used the energy around her to either wallow in self-pity or to dig deeper than she had ever gone before and start making small changes that eventually pulled her in a completely different direction.
So, when you feel like your life is pulling you in which way what, like you have no anchor and stability even though on paper, your life doesn’t appear to be wobbly, you must try to navigate your emotions as much as possible. Give yourself a helping hand by focussing, planning, connecting, building, creating, smiling, singing, appreciating, letting go, giving up, sticking too, accepting, refusing, inviting and being.
I follow a lady called Alana Fairchild and she puts it so well here;
“If you want a life of passionate purpose, start with knowing, accepting and loving who you are as a person. As you love, respect and nurture your authentic self, it will help you to understand what is best to cast aside.
You have the power to choose how you want to feel and what you want to express in each moment, no matter what is going on around you”.
It seems that my brush with a parallel universe has happened again…..if you read this blog; “Parallel Lives?” you would know that after that experience, I was convinced that we are having multiple lives that are running alongside each other in other universes.
I was also convinced of this when I once saw my daughter very clearly run into the living room, to follow her only to see that she wasn’t in there, she was fast asleep upstairs. She had on the same PJs and her hair was the same…..I clearly saw her with my own eyes yet she wasn’t there at all.
So, these two instances stand out in my mind, yet I recently had the strongest “evidence” that we may be living parallel lives.
I have a friend who was travelling up from the Southwestern coast to Essex on a Saturday a few weeks ago. He was visiting some mutual friends on the next street to where I live. I knew he was coming on the Saturday but no idea when.
At around three o’clock in the afternoon I left my home for my dog walk. I walked past the street that has the house where my friend would be visiting that weekend. I wondered if he was there yet or still on his travels. As I turned the corner and walked down the hill toward the main road, a dark coloured car passed me slowly. I looked into the car as it approached and squinted my eyes as I recognised the driver to be my friend. He did what looked like a double take of me, as recognition also flittered across his face and then he waved at me. I couldn’t believe that we had crossed paths at the same time.
As he drove on, I was half expecting him to stop and jump out and say hello, but he kept on going. As this was all happening, the energy around me felt strange. It’s hard to explain – I saw him, recognised him instantly and knew he did me…I knew it was him, but I thought it was unusual that he didn’t stop. I also thought what a coincidence that he drove past me just at the right time. In that moment, it was like I knew I had saw him, but it was like he wasn’t even there. I grabbed my phone and sent him a message.
“Did you just drive past me?”
He replied; “No, I didn’t make the journey, haven’t been well at all so decided to stay here instead”.
I stopped in my tracks. But I had seen him? He saw me? We had waved at each other, both with a look of “fancy seeing you here” on our faces as he drove toward his friend’s house….however in reality he was MILES away.
I told him what had happened, and he was equally mystified.
Could it have been a look alike? Massive coincidence that he waved at me though and in those split seconds had the same “mannerism” as my friend (the way he waved at me was so him!).
Or perhaps could it have been cognitive bias? I knew he was travelling up on that day at some point and his doppelgänger just happened to wave right at me, so I thought he was my friend?
So just a massive coincidence? But why wasn’t the guy they waved different? Perhaps a different hair colour, skin colour….gender even? The fact he looked THE SAME freaked me out.
The way the energy changed felt off too….like I was in a different time zone? It’s hard to explain it, but seeing him in his car, I felt like I was in a different period of my life, like it was jumbled up.
It led me to think hard on this as I do have a belief that we each have one soul that has many streams of our individual self that run alongside each other, having the same yet different lives.
Like the film sliding doors, each decision or life choice results in an alternative set of life experiences. Can you imagine what would have happened if you had taken that job all those years ago? Or dated your childhood sweetheart? Or got on the train that you just missed?
I believe that the people in our lives now are still in our parallel lives yet perhaps different things are occurring because of the routes we are taking. So, he and I are still friends in this other universe, but when I saw him, he was well and able to make the trip. I felt like I had just glimpsed into another dimension. A tiny split in the jelly of our universe allowed me to peek inside another reality.
Which gets me thinking even deeper on this….if I can read future energy when doing tarot readings….or if I can connect to people that have died through mediumship…why can’t I connect to my other “selves” in other Universes…this is something I may have to experiment with in the future!
Over recent months I have noticed the same question being asked on beginner’s tarot forums, along the lines of “do you have to be psychic to read tarot?”.
The quick answer to this, in my opinion is no, however, it seems that one thing can often lead to another when you reach a certain level of advanced tarot reading. I also feel that most people are psychic but with differing degrees of ability, like being able to draw or sing in tune.
Here is the thing, there are many sceptics out there that have no idea how accurate tarot reading is. It is spookily accurate. And much to their protests, the story being told is not made to fit the querants current life situation. Let me give you an example.
New clients are often complete strangers when then walk through my door. They have text me to book in and all I have is their first name. Not that I would do anything with a name, but in the age of social media and Facebook business pages, you cannot help most of the time to see a profile photo of the person coming to see you. This photo may give a snapshot into someone’s life and personally I don’t like this, I love just a name and a person.
A stranger who sits in my room has her tarot spread laid out in front of her. I don’t have to be a psychic to find out if she is single, divorced or in a long-term partnership, my trusty cards will do that for me. So, for example, I will turn over three cards and ask;
What is her current energy?; Death Card
How does she feel?; Ten of Swords
What influenced this?; The Tower Card
Because I have learnt the basic meanings of those three cards, I know that something has ended with no going back and it was a complete shock for her. If I wanted to dig a little deeper, I could ask the cards about her ex-partner and more than likely a King will be pulled from the shuffled deck. Depending on what suit he falls under (sword, cup, pentacle or wand) I can then go on to describe his personality in detail, and she agrees and nods her head enthusiastically and will say something like, “Yes! That’s spot on, how do you know that?”.
Up until this point, I have not needed to tune in psychically, the cards have given me exactly what I need to know. On occasion, it can be harder to decipher the information being presented but after many years of practice, it becomes a language of symbols, numbers, images, and colours that provide all you need to know as a reader.
So, your basic understanding of the cards can take you quite far, in fact, is all you need to know really to give a rewarding and beneficial tarot reading. But what if you wanted to know the details of the breakup? You can see it’s over; it was mega stressful and a shock…but what if you wanted to know the ins and outs of what happened?
This is where your psychic ability kicks in. When you join those three cards together and relax your mind, you connect the cards and allow a story to unfold. Suddenly you may be drawn to an image on the card you have never seen before. It is a suitcase next to a doorway. You tell your sitter that he up and left, no warning. Then you see that the card is number 13 and say it was approximately 12 to 13 months ago. Then you see two people pushing a boat along and tell her you can see two children, both boys. You might notice a dog in the grass, and he is half covered in the picture and tell her that she and the ex are sharing the dog as a 50/50 split. Your sitter says yes to this all and is astonished how you have managed to piece this all together with your cards. This is where your intuition kicks in and used your cards as a gateway to access the psychic information. You have literally just read the energy of her life.
This not only works with tarot cards. I recently connected to the spirit of my client’s father, who was in his late twenties when he died when she was just a little girl. As I sat in my reading room and asked the man to show me how he died, I suddenly heard a huge firework go off outside in the street which made me jump in my seat.
“He died very suddenly, it was like a firework going off in his head, he just dropped dead?” I asked, she nodded her head “Yes! He just died out of the blue, no warning, just bang and he was gone”………
This is how messages are given to mediums and psychics, it is just a case of reading the silent language and mostly, trusting the information you receive.
Tarot is a fantastic framework to connect to the energy of pretty much anything – it is a toolbox that your sprit guide will use to convey the messages that need to be said. Once you begin to trust your intuitive side, the cards come to life, you then see a story that is behind the imagery on the cards, it comes forward and takes on a life of its own….and that is when the magic happens.
I read that sentence recently and it resonated with me at this time in my life “Health is Wealth”. I’m practically at the front porch of knocking on forty’s door and this year, this last year of my thirties, I’ve had more chronic health conditions than I think I ever have. It’s literally been one thing after the other. I can happily say that I’ve managed to get rid of most of them due to lifestyle change.
I should also note that I have a chronic autoimmune disease, endometriosis, which, even after an operation in 2019 to try and remove it all, has started to creep right back in with a host of symptoms that change from month to month.
So, to cut a long story short, I have realized one very simple thing during the whole lockdown experience of 2020, that if I don’t get my act together now, I am going to spend my next forty years with chronic pain. Don’t get me wrong, I am a healthy woman in general, however, I can hand on heart say that I learnt consistency this summer. Gone are the days where I could be really health conscious Monday to Thursday and then just let loose at the weekend, the consistency has to be an everyday thing.
So, as I had a huge amount of time of my hands during lockdown (my therapy practice was closed), I decided to go back to running, every other day. I also combined this with yoga sessions and the odd online HIIT class. I up’ed my game with water, like seriously. Two litres of water (measured out with my special bottle that keeps track) and herbal teas on top of that (I haven’t given up coffee, but I have just one cup a day now). I’m working on cutting out chocolate and crisps entirely and basically, everything that enters my mouth now is from a fruit, vegetable, pulse or lean meat (I have seven to ten portions a day of veg & fruit now), 98% of every meal I eat is home cooked, with fresh ingredients. Takeaways are now a thing of the past, or a two-monthly treat, as opposed to twice a week. Everything is in moderation now, so alcohol is well under the 14 units per week and only on Friday’s and Saturdays. Even desserts like ice cream I’m saving as a Sunday treat. Is this too regimented? I don’t think it is, I don’t feel like I have much of a choice now because as soon as I overindulge in something like white bread or pizza, I feel awful the next day. I could write a whole blog on exactly what I have been eating, but I will save that for a later post.
With the running and exercise, I make hay while the sun shines. What does this mean exactly? My chronic illness means that for one week of the month, I am poorly. I have what can only be described as a split physical body disorder! Obviously, I have made that up, but honestly the difference between my heathy days as opposed to my unwell days is startling. During my good days, I can get up at 7am without so much as a yawn, do housework, do this task, that task, play with my daughter, go for a 4 mile run, come home, prepare a dinner from scratch, do a hobby or something in the evening….with the same amount of energy I started with in the morning. Then, at around day 19 of my cycle, symptoms begin to creep in. It starts with nausea after every meal, especially dinner time, it doesn’t matter how slow I eat, I want to vomit for 30 minutes after eating. Sharp pains intensify, sometimes in my back, mostly on the left side (where my surgeon had to move my ovary that was stuck to my pelvic wall last year), this pain shoots down my leg or constantly grinds in my back. When my period is due, I have the most intense exhaustion, to the point where sometimes I don’t get dressed. I can sleep for 12 hours straight but still wake up with the worst brain fog, I forget words, or cannot concentrate, I drop things constantly, I walk into things. It can be hard for me to hold a conversation….I don’t want to talk to anyone. I am a complete shadow of the woman that was pacing along the streets with her ear pods in a week earlier! Sorry for TMI but I have very heavy bleeding that intensifies the pain and lowers my iron levels, meaning I have to up my supplements (and not give up meat, something I have chosen not to do yet until I get my endo under control). I haven’t got it under control yet, because nothing works for me (from a medical point of view), so I am trying every avenue at the moment, as that one week that it takes from me add’s up to a lot of time in the bigger picture.
As much as I hate this illness, I understand that endo is not the worst illness to have and in comparison, to others, I am very lucky, someone with a life threatening illness would take it any day of the week compared to what they are going through.
So why am I telling you all this? Is it to gloat about how I’ve managed to stick to a healthy practice routine or that I’ve lost over half a stone by doing this? No, it isn’t . Because it has taken me half of my life to understand the importance of good nutrition and proper care for my mental, emotional, physical and spiritual needs and this year, during one of the worst times in our recent modern history, I cracked it. I tell you this because if you, like me, are approaching the mid-life years, or are well into the your winter years, if you are not educating yourself about your health and trying to do better, then you need to bear the consequences of what that means to you. I understand that some conditions are not our fault (as you have read, I have one of those) but, we are all responsible to make healthy choices to ease what we have been dealt with and to prevent other things from starting, because believe me, if you neglect your body now, they will come.
So, today is the youngest you will EVER be. Why not make hay whilst the sun shines and start implementing some better choices, practices and plan how you want your future to look? I personally want to retain the feeling I have, on my well days, for as long as possible, well into my golden years! It is a fact that we are all living longer now. It is so easy, when you are in your twenties and thirties to think you have all this time and that cause and effect doesn’t really apply when you are young…..well actually, you are wrong. I think for a the lucky very few, they can get away with drinking, smoking, eating crap all their life, but let’s face it, we are not all Keith Richards are we? So I say, do it like the French do, everything you love in moderation, find the balance, know what foods your body wants and needs, avoid those that make you feel awful and move your body (if you don’t use it……you lose it).
No matter what their specialty is, whether they are healers, massage therapists, psychics or aromatherapists, acupuncturists, the list goes on, I am always so amazed and inspired by the natural healing abilities all of these different modalities.
Last Friday I had a treat day, I had three self-care type experiences booked in for myself, my regular facial, reiki treatment and reading with a psychic. What I found was on that day, not only did I feel fantastic at the end of it, but I got something from each and every one of those therapists.
For example, during my facial with my lovely therapist, she did a beautiful neck and shoulder massage. Her hands are particularly hot, there are no surprises that she is a Reiki practitioner also. After she spent quite a bit of time massaging between my shoulder blades, she asked me if I have pain between my shoulders, on one particular side, as she could feel a heat spot there. Sure enough, I have a weak area on that very spot that can cause me immense pain if it gets triggered. My therapist’s healing hands are able to detect heat spots on the client’s bodies, she has done this with others, she can feel the exact area that needs healing.
After this appointment I then went to see a lovely friend and neighbour who I do regular therapy swaps with, it was my turn and I had chosen Reiki. During the amazing session, at the very end, after feeling deeply relaxed I started to see a vision. A vision is something that is played out in your mind however, it’s not coming from you. As I looked into the darkness of my own eyes, suddenly it became sepia and I started to watch what can only be described as a movie scene. First of all, I saw two Chinese people with masks on which made me think of the Coronavirus outbreak. Then I was shown different hands, lots and lots and lots of different pairs of hands, all healing, all helping the world to heal. It is like I was being given a message about how profound and very important healing is, on a natural level as well as a medicinal one. To back this up, my lovely therapist told me that she saw, in her mind’s eye, a vision of lots of people joined together by their hands….healing. We were certainly both being shown a message here.
Then, in the evening, I had a psychic reading with a lovely lady I had never met before. After an incredible 40 minutes or so, where she practically told me everything that I have been thinking, feeling and planning with my business, the most profound bit came.
In January I had a vivid dream that I was sitting in a circle of people, and one person, a young black man, really stood out. He was wearing old type robes and looking right at me, repeating the word: “Malachi…….Malachi……..Malachi”, I even woke up saying the word. So, I instantly googled it and Malachi is from Biblical times, translating into “Spirit Messenger”. I took this as a nice sign that I am on the right path, particularly with my mediumship.
However, fast forward to my reading with the lovely psychic, at the end of the reedling I could see her struggling with a word and then it flew out of her mouth “They are saying, Malachi. Mean anything to you?”. The hairs on the back of my arms went up. I told her about my dream. The psychic said that not only does she feel that the young black chap was actually a new guide (I had a feeling of this too recently), but this word has something to do also with Reiki. She told me about a Reiki course, which sounds very much like Malachi and they want me to go on it, she even recommended a Reiki Master for me, which turns out, is my Reiki master! So, after our session, I contacted my Reiki Master and she told me the course is called “Muny Ki” and is a 3-day course which allows you to receive sacred rites, bringing in much positive change, healing, and transformation, that you can also pass on to others.
So, there you go, three different therapists, three different modalities, and amazing experiences with each.
Your spiritual and emotional wellbeing is so important, never overlook an alternative healer or someone that works with the energies, as this can be powerful stuff, powerful stuff indeed!
Recently I met a lovely new client who said something to me which rang a little bell in my heart. She told me that sometimes, she has this inner feeling of knowing, like an energetic feeling, that something big is coming her way, like something good, derived from happiness, like, her purpose. I understood exactly what she meant; this is the first time I’ve heard someone else say out loud what I often feel myself.
However, it’s been hard to hear it lately, as sometimes, like everyone else, I can have days when I feel low and not really sure why. I don’t think this weather is helping (that makes me sound like my nan) but seriously, it’s been overcast since about November, hasn’t it? Anyway, I’ve had to dig deep for the motivation that normally just spills out of me with ease, I’ve had a real brain fog lately, sometimes even worrying that the best of my ambition has gone like my 30s are about to go behind me………can you believe that negativity? That is not my normal vibe. I want to stress that as soon as that creeps in, I deal with it, like, I’m not having that, at all.
So, when this happens, I go back to basics with my mental health, everything I teach my students on my Law Of Attraction Course: Routine, Self-Care, De-Stress, Back To Nature. Go walking (I notice a direct link to my mental health and how often I get out walking with my dog Seb), meditation (I fell asleep to the Shipping Forecast the other night, it was lush!), exercise, good diet, loads of water, going within myself to find inner peace, less worry and more “home” time. What do I mean by home time? Home is the place inside you that is safe, yours and is where you are connected to the source of all that is, it’s your energetic life force that tells you that you have absolutely nothing at all to fear. Have you found yours yet?
After months of preparing to launch my Law Of Attraction Course online, it was ready to launch today (Monday 24th Feb). I think this has contributed to my feeling of unease. I’m about to embark on something that I’ve been working toward and thinking about for ages. Last year I imagined what it would be like to launch my LOA course, online, to a wider audience. I had no idea how to even start, but using the power of manifestation, I managed to get all the knowledge, resources and contacts I needed, and low and behold, I manifested it. Now comes the fear bit, the bit where I wonder if it will do well. I always say this, it’s not about the money for me, it’s about the impact and the connection to fellow humans, that’s what I get excited about, but then I am fearful if it won’t be received with love, I had a few hurtful comments when I initially sent an advert out (not from my page likers or local community should I add), this did scare me a bit, but then I must remember that being scared is a block to reaching out for your dreams, fear must be overcome and moved to the side.
What am I trying to say with this week’s post? I guess it is, going back to that feeling in the first paragraph. Once we have found our life’s purpose, it puts us in a flow of energy and gives us a feeling unlike any other we have ever experienced. It’s personal, it’s not about anyone else. It’s like we are fulfilling a subconscious dream that we came here to do, we recognize it like an old friend, and hand in hand we navigate a path together, meeting new people along the way, having incredible experiences at each crossroads, letting our gut take us there and nodding in agreement because we know it’s the right way, the right direction.
People always say to me that they don’t know what their purpose is. I can’t answer that for people, it’s something you must find within yourself. My purpose is connecting to the spirit world, proving life after death exists and most of all, helping others of this life journey with grief, worry, and pain. I know I am lucky that I found my purpose, but all I did was listen to my inner voice. What is yours telling you?
Once you find it, listen, understand it and let it guide you. Then, just go for it, please just go for it!
Until next time
Tanya
If you are interested in learning about my Positive Law Of Attraction Courses, please click on this link. Thanks!
Last week I wrote about my current health issue and how worried I was (initially) that I had a far more serious condition. The consultant really did put my mind at ease. She told me all about my issue and talked about my forthcoming operation, but she certainly did not indicate that I have anything to worry about.
During my “worry period” between the scan and the consultant appointment, I asked my nan and grandad for a sign that everything would be ok. For those of you that follow my regular weekly blog posts, you will already know that my nan (especially) is pretty good at giving me a sign from spirit, no kidding, the lady has it licked, she gives signs like a boss, she makes it effortless!
On the very morning of the day I asked for a sign from her, I got one. It was Sunday and I was doing my normal weekly chore, unloading my Sainsburys food shop. I always opt for home delivery because it saves me time and I do love the banter with my local driver!
As I did this normal routine, my heart was heavy. I was still really worried about my health and I had been crying a lot the night before. As I opened the very last bag, my heart skipped a beat. There was a big bunch of Spring daffodils inside. I hadn’t ordered these during my online shop. I have never ordered flowers in a food shop. I checked the receipt, they were on there, they cost £1 a bunch. I looked at the bottom of the receipt and remembered that I had a voucher, £1 off my shopping for that week, which I had applied at the checkout point. That voucher covered the cost of the flowers…..the flowers from nan, telling me that she is thinking of me.
However, a couple of weeks later, I was reading my friends latest blog post, who said she was really chuffed to find that Sainsbury’s had sent her a free bunch of spring daffodils in her home shop delivery that week. Damn it! Everyone got the flowers….it wasn’t a sign, well, so I thought! About 3 days after my friend said about her flowers, I had had a tarot reading with my friend and fellow professional reader, Gaynor. She gave me the most amazing reading and not only that, she linked up to my nan for me. At the end of the reading, she said that nan wanted to let me know that she is there and that I must trust in her, especially when it comes to my spiritual work. She said she is passing me a bunch of yellow flowers. I couldn’t hide the smile from my face!
Now we can’t forget grandad in this. On the Thursday evening of the same week, it was time for my circle development class at the Arthur Findlay college. I am still at that new stage there, where everyone is total strangers, which is brilliant, especially when I get a reading.
A lady called Marie sat in front of me and connected to a male in spirit. She described him to me and I knew she had my grandad. In her hand she had an oracle card, one that she had been given by the tutor, to help link the spirit to me. The card said, “Trust in the Unknown”.
“He is telling you to do that. Don’t worry about the unknown, TRUST in the unknown. He is giving me the name David(his son) and talking about him cutting bread(he had a very unique way of cutting a fresh new loaf, which makes me smile whenever I think about it), he also says you have radiant blue energy all around you(my guide is called Blue) and he is talking about you when you go to bed. You lift off the two pillows on top of your bed and you have two special pillows you use(this is my exact routine every night – my special pillows because I get reflux!). He said he wants to be with you, especially in the work you do, he said he will be around you”.
As you can imagine, I was thrilled with that reading. But here is the part that makes me smile. When I used to rent a treatment room that was connected to a hairdressing salon, I used to have a very whispy spider who sat in the corner of the room. He was there for about 9 months! (I thought spiders are supposed to have a ten-day lifespan?). Everyone who knows me knows that I have a very bad fear of spiders. But I used to let this spider stay. I let him stay because I felt he was my granddads spirit (my grandad has given me a spider surprise on almost every special occasion since he died). So when I left that room for good, I actually said farewell to my little friend, Mr spider aka grandad Frank.
After the reading with Marie, on the Saturday, I had a client in my treatment room (which is now at home) and as I placed my hands over her eyes, I was drawn to look in the corner of my room. There was my whispy little friend, the same type of spider (which I haven’t seen since I was in my old treatment room 18 months ago). I knew instantly it was grandad, just as Marie had said, being with me during my work. I smiled at him and said he could stay, as long as he doesn’t come near my treatment couch.
I also got another strong sign from spirit that week, this time it was from Blue.
It was during that same night that I had my reading with Marie.
Some of us were chosen to stand up (in front of twenty others!) and do some inspirational speaking. Each person had to get up and choose a stone from a small basket which had a word on it and then talk about what that word meant to them, words like gratitude or love.
When it was my turn, I picked up my stone with sweaty hands (I was so nervous!). I turned over the stone to see what my word was:
“Strength”………………..
What was I going to say? What does strength mean to me, mean to anyone? Then I remembered the card that Marie had for me “Trust in the Unknown”. So this is what I started with, I can’t remember exactly what I said to everyone, I believe it went a little like this:
“What is strength? Strength is trust, its trust in the unknown. We all need our own inner strength, to know we can depend on us, above all else, during our life’s journey. From the day we are born to the day we die, we will have our ups and downs, our hard days and our good days and the days in between, we will need inner strength to get us through….but we must know that we are supported, that someone or something has our back…ALWAYS, we are supported in this life by an unseen force, we must Trust In The Unknown”.